由衷感谢前个周末前来支持我妈咪的治丧题目会和仪式的会友干事，还有之前陪我们全家一块儿唱题的会友与干事们。谢谢大家的关心和慰问，谢谢你们！
死亡是每个人的必经路，就是释尊和日莲大圣人也是一样。所以死亡是必然的，死亡并不是失败。一个人的人生胜或败应该是看他在生时做了些什么，创造了些什么价值，不是吗？妈咪在学会的贡献，认识她的人都有目共睹。一直秉持着师弟不二的精神，这二十多年来她鼓励了不少亲戚朋友和会友念经及敬领御本尊，让他们在生命里重新拥有希望和勇气面对生活上的挑战。
你知道吗，20年前妈咪患鼻癌时最放不下的就是年迈的外婆和当时只有7岁的弟弟。两年前，89岁的外婆过世了；如今弟弟也大学毕业有了自己的事业。妈咪完成了心愿 - 尽了孝道、也把弟弟培育成了广布人材，还成为了三个可爱孙女的外婆呢！
妈咪在她这一生，患过四次癌症，但她最终是死于肺炎（肺部受细菌感染）而不是癌症。她曾经对我说过，她的宿业一定会转换，她绝对不会死于癌症。果然如此！
其实，她身体因所以不能抵挡区区的肺部感染，是因为20年前患鼻癌所接受的治疗的副作用 - 难以进食。和癌症决战的关键时刻，她因为不能进食，而身体无法摄取需要的营养素和燃料作战。从这个观点，我非常感激御本尊和这个妙法，延长了我妈咪20年的寿命。这过去的20年对我来说真的是无比珍贵。从小就没跟妈咪住在同个屋檐下，在一起的时间可想而知有多么少。但自从十二年前当了妈妈过后的我，终于体会到当妈妈的辛劳和总总压力与责任。渐渐地，无论在哪一方面都很有见解的妈咪，自然就成为了我的万能军师。对我而言，我们的感情真的是前所未有地好，无可不谈。
你知道吗，御本尊的安排可真微妙！发现妈咪患了乳癌并开了刀过后，在之前没料到的情况下，我竟然成为了全职的家庭主妇，也因此能腾出多点时间陪妈咪复诊，等看病时还能沟通谈心。小女儿也因三个月前转读早上班，我可在她上学时过去妈咪家帮她洗刷、更衣、打针、进食、聊天，可算让我尽了一点孝道。我真的很欣慰御本尊的这一切安排！之前想为妈咪做些什么的祈求也应验了。
妈咪是个战士、是个勇士，是无可厚非的。她从不向困难低头，这次的癌症也是挑战到底，从没放弃过。近年来，除了身为我贴心、不说也能猜到我心事的妈咪之外，她也是我信心上的前辈、广布上的同志。老实说，失去了她，我好茫然无措。但与其单单思念怀念妈咪，我决定继承她那不屈不挠的勇士精神和对广布不遗余力的热忱与使命感，继续她所创下的漂亮战绩。你知道吗，去年她的本部好像每一个地区都有妇人部敬领御本尊、很多妇人部也战胜了各自的挑战、妇人部结成之日也获得了很大的成功。而且他们本部四者异体同心一齐挑战，男青还创下50位御本尊敬领者的骄人成绩！妈咪有提过要写信给池田先生，向师匠报告自己的胜利，甚至打算战胜病魔后参加日本的研修会亲自向先生报告。我决定代妈咪向师匠写那一封信，并决意会不断地努力成长、挑战自己，作我的人间革命，成为一个妈咪会引以为荣的女儿！
Monday, June 28, 2010
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Mummy's Funeral Rite : Jun-10
Our family is not considered a big one.. My maternal grandparents only had Mummy and QQ, and my granduncle had two sons; Papa is the fifth of seven children. Since young, I have always thought funeral wake is the best place to rebuild lost bonds and foster new bonds among the younger generation as everybody spends those few days and nights together. This still holds true for us as cousins and close friends came forth to take over the running of Mummy's wake from us - the grieve-striken family, allowing us time to spend final moments with Mummy's body as well as sort out our messy thoughts and feelings. Thank you so much..
In addition to family and family friends, countless friends and comrades from the Soka family also came forth to offer their condolences and prayers. In fact, even on the very first night of Mummy's wake, more than 100 people gathered to chant for Mummy's early repose. Everyday we had to order more chairs for that evening to ensure we have seats for all who would come to chant for Mummy. I was terribly touched by the magnificent sight of the hundreds of comrades in faith who came to chant for Mummy! Mummy must have touched them in some way when she was alive, that's why so many came to pay their last respects..
In addition to family and family friends, countless friends and comrades from the Soka family also came forth to offer their condolences and prayers. In fact, even on the very first night of Mummy's wake, more than 100 people gathered to chant for Mummy's early repose. Everyday we had to order more chairs for that evening to ensure we have seats for all who would come to chant for Mummy. I was terribly touched by the magnificent sight of the hundreds of comrades in faith who came to chant for Mummy! Mummy must have touched them in some way when she was alive, that's why so many came to pay their last respects..
陵英阿姨's Speech at Mummy's Funeral Rite : Jun-10
There were many wet eyes amongst the participants at Mummy's funeral rite, especially when Aunty Lynn or 陵英阿姨 was delivering her speech. To help us recap, here is what she said that night.
郑媚英女士告别仪式
杨陵英致词
2010年 6月 6日
大家好！
我是郑媚英女士的亲妹妹，我小她一岁，可是她姓郑，我姓杨，这是因为我们来自一个有18个儿女的大家庭。在60多年前，我们的亲生妈妈，也许是因为生育太多，而又重男轻女，在媚英姐诞生不久之后，她被一对郑氏夫妇收养了。他们把她当为掌上明珠， 疼爱有加，我相信比亲生父母有过之而无不及。 可是打从媚英姐懂事以后，她对我们的亲生妈妈很感气愤， 连我也气在心里。 小时候，我们两人同样在南华念书， 从小学到中学毕业， 但我们却没有来往， 后来也失去联络。
一直到两年前，2008年的4月28日，媚英姐得知我患上了乳癌，她为了帮我，而通过一位好友的安排，让我们这两个已经是60多岁的老女人，带着五味杂陈的心情见面。 我们一见如故，百感交集， 坦荡地解开一切过往的情结。从此我们经常欢聚叙旧， 而她也突然多了十多个兄弟姐妹。 我们经常跟她欢聚，分享生活里的趣事， 她也从新享受到失去已久的温馨亲情， 大家都非常开心。
正当大家都沉浸于相认重聚而感到无比的欢欣时，就在去年 2009年的2月13日，我们获知她患上乳癌的恶讯。 我们都为她担心害怕， 可是她却表现出一副大无畏的精神， 准备跟病魔搏斗。真像是老天爷在开我们两姐妹的玩笑，此后我们在患难中互相扶持和鼓励，披荆斩棘地勇往直前。
那时我找出在 2008年2月27日海峡时报的 Mind Your Body。副刊里刊登的一篇专访媚英姐的文章， 题目是：Still Smiling After Throat, Cervical and Nose Cancer。我们才知道她从19年前开始已连续患过三种癌症，但她却能够勇敢地走过来。在文章中记者赞赏她是个勇敢的抗癌战士，更是所有癌症病患者的楷模。
这么多年来，她以自己的艰辛抗癌过程与经验，去辅导和鼓励很多患上各种癌症的病友，帮助他们重获新生；所以一提到“Auntie May” 相信很多人都知道，就是这位郑媚英女士，凡是认识她的人都以她为傲， 引以为荣。
即使一直到三，四个月前她的体力已显著下降时，她还是四处奔波，不把自己的病情放在心里，照样去帮忙辅导别的病患者。
非常可惜，媚英姐这十多年来有着非常稀有的一种状况，连医生都不明白其所以然， 那就是她不能正常进食，几乎是食物一下口，一阵子后就不得不吐出来，她每天只靠着一点咖啡或白开水或一些糖类甜品支撑着。这种情况可说是她这一回跟病魔战斗的不利之处。大约是从两个星期前开始，她更难于进食，结果体力直线下降，而在几天前因肺部受到病菌（不是癌细胞）的感染而呼吸困难，最后终于因为肺部受到严重感染，不能呼吸而离开了我们。
媚英姐的的确确是个非常坚强的女性， 在生活中如此，在跟病魔战斗的时候也如此。这些都是我亲身体会的。在最近，当我每天问候她时，她曾经好多次私底下告诉我，说她很难受，这里我就不提她所用的形容词了；当我问她的家人时，他们都不晓得，我心里才知道，她不愿意让亲爱的家人担心。可见她是一位多么坚强，多么会替人着想的人。
谈到乐于助人和慈悲之心，让我随便举个例子吧：今年的华人新年除夕， 当她知道一位刚认识不久的，患上癌症，来自马来西亚的女性朋友是单身寡人在这里过年时， 她就邀请她来家里一同吃团圆饭， 待她如自己的家人一样。 媚英姐就是这样一位心地善良，待人热情，为人慷慨的大好人。
媚英姐从很年轻的时候就开始为美好的生活努力打拼，她结婚后跟她的先生携手努力，建立美好幸福的家庭。我想，我这么说应该没错：她的最大成就和最令她感到快乐和骄傲的，是她养育了三个聪慧能干，品行善良的儿女，他们都受到良好的教育，大学毕业，学有所成。 最为难得的是， 三位儿女，欣洋，奎鄄， 和鸿， 都非常孝顺。 在妈妈病重期间，两位女儿欣洋和奎鄄日夜不断地不遗余力，上下奔波，照顾得无微不至，把其他一切的事都放在其次；和鸿因为工作时间的伸缩性比较小，白天到晚上大部分时间都得在外头，可是一回到家门的第一件事，就是亲切地问候妈妈，在很多方面他也尽力分担两个姐姐照顾妈妈的繁重事务。这些都是我这一年多以来亲眼目睹的情景，所以，常听到人家说的“久病床前无孝子”这句话，我可以说，并不是放诸四海皆准的。
媚英姐的夫君何敦克先生，鉴于孩子们有见识，又非常细心，他都放心让三个孩子去处理一切。可是我相信知道的人很少：他很疼爱媚英姐， 非常关心和担心她的病情； 所谓男儿有泪不轻弹，我的老公告诉我，他经常忧心忡忡地，把我的老公拉到一旁，询问和讨论媚英姐的病况， 那种爱惜关心之情表露无遗。
所谓好人常有好人关照，媚英姐的女婿 Victor。也全力支持太太去照顾患病的岳母，Victor 不只是个好丈夫，好父亲，也是个非常难得的儿子和女婿，他的诚恳待人和善良的心地，令我深深感动。
此外，我亲身目睹和体会到的，还有媚英姐的弟弟奕良， 和鸿的女朋友 Dorothy 以及奎鄄的好友Florence对于媚英姐的关怀和照顾。当然，还有很多其他真诚关心和照顾过媚英姐的亲朋戚友，是我不认识或没亲眼见到的，我无从说出他们的名字和事实情况， 请他们包涵。
无可置疑的，媚英姐的一生非常成功。她是个好妻子，好母亲，好姐妹，好干部，好朋友，在家庭和事业方面有骄人的成就，而且通过她的学会以及本着个人的善心，她不遗余力地关照和帮助了无数的人。 今天她虽然走了，但是她的爱心， 善心以及勇敢无畏，诚心助人的精神， 将永远留存在我们的心里， 我们将永远怀念这位令人深深敬爱的英勇战士。
媚英姐，我们向您拜别了！也默祝您在天之灵能够好好安息 ！
谢谢大家！
郑媚英女士告别仪式
杨陵英致词
2010年 6月 6日
大家好！
我是郑媚英女士的亲妹妹，我小她一岁，可是她姓郑，我姓杨，这是因为我们来自一个有18个儿女的大家庭。在60多年前，我们的亲生妈妈，也许是因为生育太多，而又重男轻女，在媚英姐诞生不久之后，她被一对郑氏夫妇收养了。他们把她当为掌上明珠， 疼爱有加，我相信比亲生父母有过之而无不及。 可是打从媚英姐懂事以后，她对我们的亲生妈妈很感气愤， 连我也气在心里。 小时候，我们两人同样在南华念书， 从小学到中学毕业， 但我们却没有来往， 后来也失去联络。
一直到两年前，2008年的4月28日，媚英姐得知我患上了乳癌，她为了帮我，而通过一位好友的安排，让我们这两个已经是60多岁的老女人，带着五味杂陈的心情见面。 我们一见如故，百感交集， 坦荡地解开一切过往的情结。从此我们经常欢聚叙旧， 而她也突然多了十多个兄弟姐妹。 我们经常跟她欢聚，分享生活里的趣事， 她也从新享受到失去已久的温馨亲情， 大家都非常开心。
正当大家都沉浸于相认重聚而感到无比的欢欣时，就在去年 2009年的2月13日，我们获知她患上乳癌的恶讯。 我们都为她担心害怕， 可是她却表现出一副大无畏的精神， 准备跟病魔搏斗。真像是老天爷在开我们两姐妹的玩笑，此后我们在患难中互相扶持和鼓励，披荆斩棘地勇往直前。
那时我找出在 2008年2月27日海峡时报的 Mind Your Body。副刊里刊登的一篇专访媚英姐的文章， 题目是：Still Smiling After Throat, Cervical and Nose Cancer。我们才知道她从19年前开始已连续患过三种癌症，但她却能够勇敢地走过来。在文章中记者赞赏她是个勇敢的抗癌战士，更是所有癌症病患者的楷模。
这么多年来，她以自己的艰辛抗癌过程与经验，去辅导和鼓励很多患上各种癌症的病友，帮助他们重获新生；所以一提到“Auntie May” 相信很多人都知道，就是这位郑媚英女士，凡是认识她的人都以她为傲， 引以为荣。
即使一直到三，四个月前她的体力已显著下降时，她还是四处奔波，不把自己的病情放在心里，照样去帮忙辅导别的病患者。
非常可惜，媚英姐这十多年来有着非常稀有的一种状况，连医生都不明白其所以然， 那就是她不能正常进食，几乎是食物一下口，一阵子后就不得不吐出来，她每天只靠着一点咖啡或白开水或一些糖类甜品支撑着。这种情况可说是她这一回跟病魔战斗的不利之处。大约是从两个星期前开始，她更难于进食，结果体力直线下降，而在几天前因肺部受到病菌（不是癌细胞）的感染而呼吸困难，最后终于因为肺部受到严重感染，不能呼吸而离开了我们。
媚英姐的的确确是个非常坚强的女性， 在生活中如此，在跟病魔战斗的时候也如此。这些都是我亲身体会的。在最近，当我每天问候她时，她曾经好多次私底下告诉我，说她很难受，这里我就不提她所用的形容词了；当我问她的家人时，他们都不晓得，我心里才知道，她不愿意让亲爱的家人担心。可见她是一位多么坚强，多么会替人着想的人。
谈到乐于助人和慈悲之心，让我随便举个例子吧：今年的华人新年除夕， 当她知道一位刚认识不久的，患上癌症，来自马来西亚的女性朋友是单身寡人在这里过年时， 她就邀请她来家里一同吃团圆饭， 待她如自己的家人一样。 媚英姐就是这样一位心地善良，待人热情，为人慷慨的大好人。
媚英姐从很年轻的时候就开始为美好的生活努力打拼，她结婚后跟她的先生携手努力，建立美好幸福的家庭。我想，我这么说应该没错：她的最大成就和最令她感到快乐和骄傲的，是她养育了三个聪慧能干，品行善良的儿女，他们都受到良好的教育，大学毕业，学有所成。 最为难得的是， 三位儿女，欣洋，奎鄄， 和鸿， 都非常孝顺。 在妈妈病重期间，两位女儿欣洋和奎鄄日夜不断地不遗余力，上下奔波，照顾得无微不至，把其他一切的事都放在其次；和鸿因为工作时间的伸缩性比较小，白天到晚上大部分时间都得在外头，可是一回到家门的第一件事，就是亲切地问候妈妈，在很多方面他也尽力分担两个姐姐照顾妈妈的繁重事务。这些都是我这一年多以来亲眼目睹的情景，所以，常听到人家说的“久病床前无孝子”这句话，我可以说，并不是放诸四海皆准的。
媚英姐的夫君何敦克先生，鉴于孩子们有见识，又非常细心，他都放心让三个孩子去处理一切。可是我相信知道的人很少：他很疼爱媚英姐， 非常关心和担心她的病情； 所谓男儿有泪不轻弹，我的老公告诉我，他经常忧心忡忡地，把我的老公拉到一旁，询问和讨论媚英姐的病况， 那种爱惜关心之情表露无遗。
所谓好人常有好人关照，媚英姐的女婿 Victor。也全力支持太太去照顾患病的岳母，Victor 不只是个好丈夫，好父亲，也是个非常难得的儿子和女婿，他的诚恳待人和善良的心地，令我深深感动。
此外，我亲身目睹和体会到的，还有媚英姐的弟弟奕良， 和鸿的女朋友 Dorothy 以及奎鄄的好友Florence对于媚英姐的关怀和照顾。当然，还有很多其他真诚关心和照顾过媚英姐的亲朋戚友，是我不认识或没亲眼见到的，我无从说出他们的名字和事实情况， 请他们包涵。
无可置疑的，媚英姐的一生非常成功。她是个好妻子，好母亲，好姐妹，好干部，好朋友，在家庭和事业方面有骄人的成就，而且通过她的学会以及本着个人的善心，她不遗余力地关照和帮助了无数的人。 今天她虽然走了，但是她的爱心， 善心以及勇敢无畏，诚心助人的精神， 将永远留存在我们的心里， 我们将永远怀念这位令人深深敬爱的英勇战士。
媚英姐，我们向您拜别了！也默祝您在天之灵能够好好安息 ！
谢谢大家！
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Mummy Has Moved On : Jun-10
About 4:55pm on Jun 2, 2010 was the last time I spoke to Mummy at her place. I bade her goodbye in my usual manner as she was sitting on the couch watching her usual 包公 series on the telly.
What was unusual was that she was almost sleeping the entire day and the entire night before, which was a rare luxury for her since mid-April this year where she began her slumberless days and nights. Despite her drowsiness, she refused to sleep further by late afternoon and made a tremendous effort to get out of bed. She proceeded to the living room where she drank some water and finished a bottle of herbalife shake as well as some soursop my 伯伯 & 伯母 had brought over when they visited her that morning.
I don't think she completed her episode of 包公 before she returned to the bedroom again. She went back to her slumber and slipped into unconsciousness amidst her difficult breathing.
According to the paramedics who brought her to the hospital in the ambulance that night, mummy has gone into respiratory arrest. She had a serious lung infection which her immune system was unable to fight.
According to Sherman, mummy's immune system had began shutting down a couple of days back due to lack of nutrients and fuel.. she hardly had any food intake and even threw up whatever little she ate.. This side effect of throwing up food from the nose cancer treatment during which she almost lost her life, did her in.. and she lost her life to pneumonia. Hence, despite a pronounced terminal-stage breast cancer patient, the cancer cells in her body were manageable but the viruses, bacteria and parasites were not.. at least not yet.
Most importantly, her poor ailing body was exhausted.. consistently she had eaten and puke most of the food she put through her mouth in the last twenty years; and despite her condition, for the last more than a year and a half, she had bravely and carefully swallowed countless supplement pills and capsules everyday to provide her body with ammunition to fight her cancer; final straw must be the indescribable pain and numbness she experienced all over her body on top of the daily sleepless days and nights in the past two months. Mummy is a fighter through and through.. although mummy has never gave up the battle, it must have been too much for her body to bear. I am sure she is as reluctant to leave us as we are overwhelmed with grief to see her go.. No doubt, she has left behind a legacy for us to follow up. She has completed her mission here and has gone on to begin a new mission.. for sure in a much healthier body; we should be happy for her. She has prolonged her life for exactly 20 years as she has wished, and has completed her duties as a filial daughter, responsible mum and wife, encouraged and nurtured numerous friends, gakkai members and leaders in their faith and lives, and even became a grandma of three lovely girls! Everyone is walking nearer towards death everyday from the minute he or she is born, without a single exception. What matters more than the length of one's life is what value the person has created in that life. Mummy has definitely lived her life more than well, and will remain an inspiration and role model to her children and many others. I am extremely proud to have this beautiful and courageous mummy, and will strive hard to be a daughter of whom she will be proud of too..
What was unusual was that she was almost sleeping the entire day and the entire night before, which was a rare luxury for her since mid-April this year where she began her slumberless days and nights. Despite her drowsiness, she refused to sleep further by late afternoon and made a tremendous effort to get out of bed. She proceeded to the living room where she drank some water and finished a bottle of herbalife shake as well as some soursop my 伯伯 & 伯母 had brought over when they visited her that morning.
I don't think she completed her episode of 包公 before she returned to the bedroom again. She went back to her slumber and slipped into unconsciousness amidst her difficult breathing.
According to the paramedics who brought her to the hospital in the ambulance that night, mummy has gone into respiratory arrest. She had a serious lung infection which her immune system was unable to fight.
According to Sherman, mummy's immune system had began shutting down a couple of days back due to lack of nutrients and fuel.. she hardly had any food intake and even threw up whatever little she ate.. This side effect of throwing up food from the nose cancer treatment during which she almost lost her life, did her in.. and she lost her life to pneumonia. Hence, despite a pronounced terminal-stage breast cancer patient, the cancer cells in her body were manageable but the viruses, bacteria and parasites were not.. at least not yet.
Most importantly, her poor ailing body was exhausted.. consistently she had eaten and puke most of the food she put through her mouth in the last twenty years; and despite her condition, for the last more than a year and a half, she had bravely and carefully swallowed countless supplement pills and capsules everyday to provide her body with ammunition to fight her cancer; final straw must be the indescribable pain and numbness she experienced all over her body on top of the daily sleepless days and nights in the past two months. Mummy is a fighter through and through.. although mummy has never gave up the battle, it must have been too much for her body to bear. I am sure she is as reluctant to leave us as we are overwhelmed with grief to see her go.. No doubt, she has left behind a legacy for us to follow up. She has completed her mission here and has gone on to begin a new mission.. for sure in a much healthier body; we should be happy for her. She has prolonged her life for exactly 20 years as she has wished, and has completed her duties as a filial daughter, responsible mum and wife, encouraged and nurtured numerous friends, gakkai members and leaders in their faith and lives, and even became a grandma of three lovely girls! Everyone is walking nearer towards death everyday from the minute he or she is born, without a single exception. What matters more than the length of one's life is what value the person has created in that life. Mummy has definitely lived her life more than well, and will remain an inspiration and role model to her children and many others. I am extremely proud to have this beautiful and courageous mummy, and will strive hard to be a daughter of whom she will be proud of too..
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